Marriage Jokes – good laugh

JUST FOR LAUGHS!!!

Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u goin? Man:
I’m goin 2 listen lecture on ill effects of drinking.
Cop: Who’ll lecture at midnite?
Man: My wife…

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Law Professor: Which is the most important LAW of Finance
for Starting a New Business?
Student: Father-in-Law!

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Before marriage: Roses are red, sky is blue. U r beautiful,
I luv u.
After marriage: Roses are dead, I’m blue. U r my
headache, one day I’ll kill u.

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What’s the biggest pressure for Pak captain when Pak needs
1 run to win
in 8 ovrs, with 5 wickets in hand?
Ya Allah! How to speak English in presentation ceremony?

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Beggar: Saab 12Rs do na coffee peeni hai.
Man: Lekin coffee to 6Rs ki hai?
Beggar: Par saab girlfrend bhi to hai.
Man: Bhikari hokar bhi GF banali.
Beggar: Na saab,GF ne Bhikari bana diya!

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Q: Why do women live longer than men?
A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

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Wats the diff between Complete & Finished?
If you find good wife u r complete otherwise u r finished.

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Have u heard about the man who threw his wife into a pond
of crocodiles?
He’s now being harassed by the animal rights for being
cruel to the crocodiles.

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Two men r talking. 1st: I got married coz I was tired of eating out,
cleaning the house, doing the laundry & wearing shabby
clothes. 2nd: Amazing, I just got divorced for the very same  reasons

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Wife: If I dismiss the cook and make the food myself for a
month, what will you pay me?
Husband: I won’t have to pay you, you’ll get my entire
insurance amount.

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